Book Review: John Ajvide Lindqvist’s Itsy Bitsy
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Itsy Bitsy
A Short Story by John Ajvide Lindqvist
2011 / 15 Pages
The Setup: Destined to become a modern classic, the short story Itsy Bitsy is guaranteed to make you think twice before you take a picture of someone in a bikini. In this creepy shocker, horror author superstar John Ajvide Lindqvist (LET THE RIGHT ONE IN, HANDLING THE UNDEAD) gives new meaning to punishing the paparazzi. (from Amazon)
Remember that show that was broadcast on FX a few years back called Dirt? Yes you do. It was about a tabloid newspaper run by Courtney Cox. Sound familiar? They used to show pointless scenes of her in bed with a vibrator every week that did absolutely nothing to advance the overall plot of the story being told. No? At the very least you watched when, after the ratings started to slip, Jennifer Aniston came on the show and made out with Courtney Cox. A-ha! Now you remember! Well, remember that Courtney Cox had a kooky cameraman paparazzi friend that suffered from manageable schizophrenia played by Ian Hart who did freelance work for the paper? Imagine him on his own adventure, spun-off into a short story, or as the kids these days would call it, a “minisode” and you’ll have a good handle on the general idea behind Itsy Bitsy.
For the first ten pages Lindqvist (and even though no proper translation credit is given one must assume from the sheer awesomeness that it’s the work of Marlaine Delargy) does a wonderful job introducing readers to the life of one Frank Johansson, a paparazzi with some deep gambling debts who essentially has been given one last chance to take the shot of his life in order to save himself from certain doom. He’s got a hot tip on where mega superstar Amanda and her rumored-to-be secret lover Roberto are holed up and he’s patiently waiting for them to make an appearance so that he can snap the photographic proof that the entire world has been salivating to see.
Frank gets his shot, and along with it a whole heck of a lot more then he expected, but when he develops the film he notices that something just isn’t quite right and it leads him to make a startling discovery which could very well end up costing him his life.
Itsy Bitsy is frustrating short story in that it finds Lindqvist at the top of his game, on par with the very dark and wonderful first thirty pages of his debut novel Let the Right One In. The problem is that over the course of the last two or three pages he tacks on an abruptly preposterous ending so awful that in nearly manages to ruin the magic of everything that came before it.
There’s also some question as to exactly where this story came from, as it appeared randomly on Amazon this past week with little to no hype. Is this brand new? Is it from Lindqvist’s 2006 short story collection Pappersväggar (Paper Walls) that has yet to be translated to English? If the former is true then someone needs to get on having every entry translated because Lindqvist was obviously still at the top of his game when Itsy Bitsy was written. If the latter is true I’m even more excited because it potentially means that we’re seeing a sneak preview of a return to greatness in his upcoming novel Little Star (set for an October release in the UK) after the slight slide of Handling the Undead and Harbour which both failed to properly deliver horrifying moments at the level one would expect from Lindqvist, the man who is constantly referred to as the Swedish equivalent of Stephen King by the media both home and abroad.
Itsy Bitsy is only available digitally from Amazon for the reasonably low cost of $0.00. Yes, it has a terrible ending, but the rest is brilliant, and you certainly can’t argue since its being given away for free. As an added bonus, the digital file also contains lengthy previews of two of Lindqvist’s other novels (the previously mentioned Handling the Undead and Harbour) so if you’ve never had the terrifying pleasure of being exposed to his body of work, Itsy Bitsy provides you with the perfect opportunity at the right price.
UPDATE: Itsy Bitsy is a translation of the short story called Syns inte! Finns inte! whch did in fact originally appear in Lindqvist’s 2006 short story collection Pappersväggar. Roughly translated Syns inte! Finns inte! means “If you don’t see it! It doesn’t exist!”
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Looks like I’m the first to properly review Itsy Bitsy . If you’ve written something about it please let me know and I’ll link to it!
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Tags: John Ajvide Lindqvist, Marlaine DeLargy, Pappersväggar
